Monthly Archives: April 2010

I am dork-tastic and socially awkward

It’s true.  I try to pretend that I’m pretty cool, but it’s more like I just try to exude cool, rather than doing or saying cool things.

Today, for instance.  I take the L and a bus home every day.  The trip lasts more than an hour, and I finished my book in the first 20 minutes.  So when I got on the bus, I searched through my bag for a copy of Rolling Stone from about 3 weeks ago.  That makes me look cool, right?  Reading RS on the bus?  Yeah. 

A handsome looking guy sat down next to me at the stop after I got on…. and I spent the next 20 minutes simply trying to exude coolness, because I get all tongue tied when talking to handsome strangers, so actually initiating conversation is usually out of the question.  Shockingly, this plan failed miserably.  It’s his loss… what kind of guy doesn’t want to talk to the girl reading about coal ash waste in Rolling Stone on the bus?

There might be a lot of posts on how I’m socially awkward in this little blog.  It’s sort of a theme of my life…


Dinner – The Ultimate Adult Decision?

Tonight, I had pierogi for dinner.  It’s not a holiday.  It’s just a regular Wednesday where I had run out of parmesan cheese for my pasta.

One of the greatest revelations of my adult life was that I could eat whatever I wanted for dinner.  Frequently, this means I eat cereal.  Or popcorn.  Or peanut butter sandwiches.  Or cheese, pickles, and wine (what?  sometimes there’s nothing in the fridge).  But it also means that I can eat pierogi whenever. I. want.

Now, I know how to make homemade pierogi (and they are darned tasty, I might add).  But I also usually keep a box of the store-bought variety in my freezer.  So when I don’t feel like pasta (again) or popcorn, I can quick chop up an onion, do a little boiling and frying, and have dinner in about 15 minutes.  And I can do this whenever I want.  See, when my family eats pierogi, we eat a LOT of pierogi.  It takes a long time to prepare, and can get a little costly.  So my mom makes them for special occasions.  And now, my sister and I make the homemade variety for special occasions.  But since there’s only one of me, “I want pierogi” is now a special occasion.

It’s odd, this “making decisions on my own” business.  It means no one else is looking out for my health and well-being.  It means that if I get scurvy because I eat nothing but cereal, pickles, popcorn, chocolate cake, and red wine for 3 weeks, I have no one to blame but myself.  It means making menus, grocery shopping, and pretending to the world that I am a responsible adult who does not eat Cheerios for most of my meals.

This summer I’ll turn 30.  I sort of hold onto the hope that when that day rolls around, I will suddenly and magically cook healthy meals for myself, pay all my bills on time, and keep my apartment tidy and homey.  Until then, I think I need to add Frosted Flakes to my grocery list.  It’s totally a dinner cereal.

Healthy Livin’

In an effort to become a healthier person, I recently (and by “recently”, I mean about 4 months ago) purchased some running shoes.  Now, the last time I was running on a regular basis (and buying new shoes yearly) was when I was in college.  Over ten years ago.  So I headed to Kohl’s (they were having a sale) and purchased the one brand I’ve been buying since I was 15. 

A few weeks later, I went to a running store to get the inserts I have to put in to support my ankles and knees, and prevent shin splints.  Apparently, the athletic shoe insert business has exploded in the past ten years.  Before, I just bought the only kind available and perhaps had to cut them a little bit to fit my shoes.  Now, I stood before an entire selection of various supportive inserts.

A helpful employee in shorts and really tall socks came over and asked what I needed.  Duh, shoe inserts.  Well, what kind of shoe did I have?  Um… the one on sale?  Apparently these inserts need to be matched to the shoe.  It’s all a very hi-tech business now.  I had to leave without my inserts… that was 3 months ago.  What?  It’s a long walk to get back and taking a bus makes me look like a wuss.

Now, I’m pretty broke and luxuries like shoe inserts are off the table.  So last week I decided I’d go running without them.  What’s the worst that could happen, right?  Well, turns out, stabbing pain in my shins and knees is actually the worst that could happen.  In an effort to keep from hobbling down the sidewalk like an old woman, I started running on the grass between the street and sidewalk.  It feels a little like running the steeplechase now, what with the hurdling over tiny fences made of lead pipes, and dodging random holes and dog crap.  And by running, I mean jogging a few blocks, walking a few blocks, jogging again, etc… for a whole mile.  Essentially, I travel four blocks down a residential street and turn around.  It’s pathetic.

But I’m moving, and that’s what’s important, right?  Damn my new “mature” metabolism and the need for actually working out to stay in shape and fit in my pants.

In the meantime, if you see me gasping for air and hobbling down the sidewalk near my apartment, give me the benefit of the doubt and assume I’m returning from a long run, rather than just starting out.  I’d do the same for you.  😉

Let’s start at the very beginning…

Or not.  I really just wanted to get Julie Andrews stuck in your head. 🙂

So.  My life can be entertaining, in an “oh my God, did you just see that girl trip over her own shoe?!” sort of way and I figured I’d document it here for other people to read and chuckle over and feel better about themselves.  And I’m doing it sort of anonymously.  I mean, if you’re here at the very beginning, you probably know who I am and I begged you to come read my blog so I feel worthwhile.  But as this site becomes a worldwide sensation, I’d rather not be globally embarassed.  Hence the sort-of-anonymous nature.

Let’s see how this goes, shall we?